I have been a s@h mom for one year now. Almost exactly one year. I have friends who are s@h moms, friends who are working moms and friends without kids. There are some common misconceptions about s@h moms that I would like to address; some myths I want to crack wide open! Here we go...
*Disclaimer: These are my opinions, not that of ALL s@h moms.
Fact: I don't have time to change my clothes. That's all. Maybe during nap time (if the children sleep and if everyone sleeps at the same time) I can grab a shower or a change of clothes, but I never count on it. It's better to be pleasantly surprised.
Myth #2: We let ourselves "go".
Fact: Our focus is not on ourselves. During the day I have a lot to do. Taking time for myself is rare. It would be great to exercise, style my hair, buy clothes for myself, get a mani/pedi, etc on a regular basis, but I don't. It's just not important to me anymore. I would rather make a room road or Banana Squirrel. I get some "me" time during the week, but my priorities are just a little different than they used to be. For those times when I leave my house looking like I got hit by a truck, please don't judge. You have no idea what kind of battle I had getting my boys to wear shoes...or pants!
Myth #3: Our lives revolve around our kids.
Fact: They do! I don't get to leave work at work. My work is 24/7...it is my life. My life is my job, and my job is to be a good parent (here are some of my goals). I work hard to be a great mom. My children are wonderful, but they are not independent yet -despite what they may think! I have to do most things for/with them. That's the stage of life we're in, and I accept it.
Myth #4: We have no social life.
Fact: Wait! That's true too! But not by choice. I spend my day at home playing with my kids, cleaning up, cooking, etc. When my hubs gets home we: eat dinner, give the boys a bath, spend time together as a family, put the boys to bed, finish our adult chores, and have just enough energy left to enjoy a glass of wine while watching one TV show before we crash! We also live on a tight budget. That means that entertainment gets cut first; especially entertainment that requires the extra cost of a babysitter. Again, this is the stage of life we are in, and I accept it.
Myth #5: We always play the "I gave birth!" card.
Fact: Check out this birth story Casey wrote. She words it so well...it's beautifully honest, actually! I can only relate to a degree (meds for #1, and meds that didn't work for delivery for #2), but nonetheless, Casey's experience is one that is shared on some level by women who choose medication and those who do not. All moms either squeeze that sweet baby out, or have it cut out of them. A little respect is well-deserved! Can I get an Amen!?
Myth #6: We watch soap operas and eat bon-bons all day long.
Fact: Seriously?! What era is this? And, what the heck is a bon bon anyways? Our TV is tuned to we PBS kids, and my diet consists of coffee and little nibbles I can steal off my kids' plates without them noticing.
Myth #7: We nap whenever they nap
Fact: Occasionally, I get to nap when my kids are napping. BUT, the following must be done for me to justify it: laundry must be folded, dishwasher must be loaded/unloaded, dinner must be planned, prepped or cooking, toys must be put away, afternoon activities must be ready. If these things are not done, I must be one of the following: on my death bed, sick, exhausted OR, one of the following must have happened prior to the nap: a really rough night, the cleaning up of a lot of bodily fluids, an enormous amount of discipline, the rapture.